It would've been the perfect sexy Easter... 🐇🍫
Hi!
I’m not great at planning things, even thought you’d think it would be a big part of what I do.
Like, I’ve been blogging for six years.
I’ve got a podcast that probably has over 200 episodes if you count the bonuses.
And obviously, I have a newsletter because you’re right it right now (hi!)
So I should probably have a content calendar. Some kind of map for all the things I have to write and record and when they should go out. A well-organized schedule that covers the next three or four months, minimum.
It would be super professional. It would make me feel real legit, too.
But nope. No fancy spreadsheet. No calendar app packed with entries. Not even a whiteboard with a bunch of dates scrawled all over it.
Just me flying by the seat of my pants every week, coming up with topics at the very last minute.
Which is why I keep missing my chance to release stuff that’s on theme.
I’ll schedule a podcast episode for Valentine’s Day - but only realize it after it’s already been recorded.
I’ll think of an angle on a trending topic - after everyone’s already forgotten about it.
I was a little bit late to the whole bear thing.
And I’ve gone and done it again.
Because I went and ordered some sex chocolates.
Not chocolates you can eat after sex - I’ve got plenty of those already. Not edible chocolate body paint - though I think I have a bottle of that somewhere around here.
Even better. It’s chocolate that’s supposed to make you hella horny.
So I’ll be taking some, letting it work its magic on me, and writing about how it went and what it made me do.
And wouldn’t that have been just perfect for this weekend? A fun little sexperiment just in time for Easter.
Except I don’t actually have the chocolates yet. They’re only coming next week. I ordered them too late - because I don’t have a content calendar.
Which is a real shame, because it’s not easy to do Easter themed sex stuff.
Well, unless you’re a porn site. Then you just slap some bunny ears and knee-high socks on a cute girl and you’ve got yourself a decent holiday porno.
But writing about sex from an Easter angle, that’s tricky.
I could come up with some random couples activities that are on theme. Like an Easter Egg hunt where the final clue leads to boinking in the bedroom. Or preparing a little gift basket with some of that colorful plastic straw and a few Tenga Eggs. Maybe even just ripping off those great Easter porn scenes and giving a blowjob with bunny ears on.
That’s kind of a stretch, though.
It’d be fun, sure. And I have written that sort of thing before. But it would be more silly than realistic.
I could definitely make it about chocolate, though. Especially if it’s the kind of chocolate that makes you so frisky you start shopping for buttplugs after eating half a square.
But nope. I missed that window.
The sexperiment will go on as planned. It just won’t line up with the holiday, which is too bad.
I’m still excited about it, though.
I’ve known about these chocolates for a while now and I’ve been really curious to try them.
And I’m always down to experiment with a product that claims it’ll get your libido out of the gutter. I even tried to get my hands on some of those gas station sex pills, but the convenience stores around here are too wimpy to sell me anything but chips and energy drinks.
So, no Easter themed post this week.
But chocolate’s good all year round. And so is being horny. So enjoy your weekend, have a fun little holiday, and I’ll report back soon to let you know if I finally found the secret to getting all sexed up.
Love,
Emma ❤
This Week’s New Articles
Those sex chocolates have their work cut out for them. Because Mr. Austin’s been super busy lately and that’s been taking a toll on my sexual desire.
A lot of guys have the wrong mindset about sex - and it’s killing their chances of getting laid.
Something fun I think you’d love! 😏
If you want to get yourself a little something fun, here’s a company I love supporting!
Sleeping on the wet spot sucks.
But you never have to do it if you lay down the Fascinator Throw!
It’s a fantastic and fully waterproof sex blanket, and it’s downright essential - especially when things get really wet and squirty.
Get one from Betty’s Toy Box and use the code LOVEEMMA at checkout to save 15% on your entire order!
Those are all affiliate links, by the way. If you click them and make a purchase (or use one of my discount codes), I earn a small commission on the sale and you’ll be supporting my work.
What’s your sexual star sign? 🐐
Can a Scorpio and a Capricorn truly be happy together?
Well, we're going to find out. This week, we're checking out our sexual horoscopes!
Also: zodiac fetishes, astrological compatibility, and making sure Jake doesn't die shoveling the driveway!
Check out the show notes for relevant links. And if you love the show, don’t forget to rate and review it on Apple Podcasts! 🖤
Connect With Me! 🥰
Follow me on Instagram, Twitter, and Bluesky.
Check out the Pillow Talk Patreon page for early access and exclusive bonus episodes!
I’ve also got a Throne wishlist if you want to treat me to something nice!
And follow me on Medium!
This newsletter contains affiliate links because your girl’s gotta eat! 😘🖤