Gifts won't get you laid... Unless... 🎄🎁
Hi!
It’s mid-December, so it’s that time of the year again.
Guys are picking out gifts for their sweethearts. They’re grabbing packages before she can see them. They’re wrapping them up as nicely as they can.
And they’re really hoping it gets them laid.
And look, you shouldn’t be giving gifts to get laid. You should be giving gifts out of the kindness of your heart and all that warm, fuzzy stuff.
But yes, a good gift might get you in her pants.
It’s just that there are so many ways to screw it up. And I’m sorry to say it, but guys tend to suck at this.
They think a big, expensive gift is their best shot at that super grateful blowjob they always fantasize about.
Or that if they put a sexy present under the tree, she’ll basically have no choice but to throw off her clothes after unwrapping it.
Some of them just figure any random gift off Amazon’s “Gifts For Her” page is going to get her so swept up in the holiday spirit that she’ll want her stocking stuffed - pronto.
But nah, it doesn’t really work that way.
A gift that can get you laid is way more personal than that.
It’s going to be something she really wants or enjoys. Something that makes her feel like you really pay attention to her.
It’s sweet and thoughtful. Something that shows you actually put some time and care into this. That she’s worth the extra effort.
And yeah, a naughty gift can work too. As long as it feels like it’s genuinely for her and not just a present to yourself - I’m looking at you, guys who like giving lingerie.
Those are the gifts that feel intimate.
Which is why they might get her in the mood to be intimate.
Oh, and how you give the gift matters too.
If you’re giving a gift because you think it means you’ll get get to come all over her tits by the end of the night, you’re out of luck. Women learn to smell desperation very early on, and it’s a big turn-off.
If you’re impatiently waiting for some holiday nookie after she opens her present, the only stomach you’ll be blowing your load on is your own.
So don’t get her a gift just to get laid.
Get her one because you care about her and you want to make her feel special.
Give it to her because you love seeing her smile and you want her to know she matters to you.
Do it because you really care about her.
And if she ends up on her hands and knees after unwrapping it, that’s just a sweet bonus.
Love,
Emma ❤
Need a Last Minute Gift?
Want to get something naughty for your special someone? Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered!
This Week’s New Articles
Giving handjobs is really fun - as long as your body can handle it. Here are a few things you can do if it can’t.
Something fun I think you’d love! 😏
If you want to get yourself a little something fun, here’s a company I love supporting!
If you want the perfect gift for the pillow humper in your life, I’ve got just the thing.
It’s the Humphrey sex toy mount. Which is a fantastic sex pillow that holds vibrators in the perfect spot for grinding and dildos in just the right place for humping.
It’s super fucking fun, incredibly discreet, and great for all sorts of sexy shenanigans!
Get one from Betty’s Toy Box and use the code LOVEEMMA at checkout to save 15% on your entire order!
Those are all affiliate links, by the way. If you click them and make a purchase (or use one of my discount codes), I earn a small commission on the sale and you’ll be supporting my work.
Whatever happened to those topless hula girl lamps? 🤔
Where did all those naked novelties go?
This week, we're talking about all the nudie stuff that used to be everywhere but seemingly vanished!
Also: racy calendars, cable TV softcore porn, and Jake is confused by sponges for some reason.
Check out the show notes for relevant links. And if you love the show, don’t forget to rate and review it on Apple Podcasts! 🖤
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