Anyone else suck at finding their community? 😅🗺️

Feb 16, 2025

Hi!

I stopped using Facebook when my extended family started creating accounts.

I didn’t mind them being online with me. But then the gossip and the pressure started.

My mom would tell me that my aunt’s neighbor’s cousin wanted to know why I didn’t accept her friend request. Or I’d get pestered about responding to all the comments people were leaving.

It just wasn’t fun anymore.

I was there to hang out with my friends. Now I was being watched by the nosiest people I knew.

So, I basically quit.

I’d post pictures of the kids once in a while - until I stopped doing that, too.

Eventually, I nuked it all and started over.

I had moved a few times, didn’t manage to stay in touch with many people, and I was ready to start fresh. I didn’t bother using my real name this time. That way, I could actually be myself.

It was pretty chill for a while.

Twitter was alright for a while. Then it became X and the whole vibe changed.

At first, it was still a decent place to get some public health info, look at hot nekkid women, and scope out a few good looking guys too. But now it’s barely worth logging into.

Instagram wasn’t too bad. But that lost its luster too.

There’s TikTok but I’m 100% just lurking on there. Which is alright, except I think the algorithm keeps pushing doom and gloom on me and that’s not great for anyone’s mental health.

I’m on Bluesky, too. Which is okay, but feels way too quiet. Mostly because I haven’t really found my people.

And honestly, that’s the biggest problem I have with every single online space I join. I can never find my community.

I don’t even know how to look for it.

There are random little things I find appealing, but it doesn’t really help me find people I can really mesh with. I’m not super nerdy about many things, so I always feel out of place when I’m checking out people who share my interests.

I’m also an awkward little wallflower who second guesses everything she wants to post. That doesn’t help, either.

But I think I’ve also figured out that there’s only one group of people I feel completely comfortable with, and it’s wholesome pervs.

People who have dirty minds, horny hearts, and who don’t pretend like they’ve never seen a gloryhole video. But they’re also not weird about it. They’re normal people with plenty of non-sexual hobbies who don’t try to steer every conversation back to pussy slapping and squirting.

They’re into smut and fucking, but they’re not on the make. You can talk about whatever and let the conversation veer into dirty territory without worrying they’ll try to put the moves on you.

Because they’re sweet, kindhearted people. Pervs with hearts of gold and search histories that should be deleted regularly.

Those are the kind of people I want to stumble onto.

It’d be great to interact with a hodgepodge of homesteaders, crafters, frugal weirdos, cozy gamers, disaster dorks, dudes with great abs, and girls with fantastic asses - who are all pervy and wholesome.

And apparently that’s tough to find because I feel like I’ve looked high and low and haven’t met a whole lot of them.

That, or I just suck at finding a community I can fit into.

So, I’ve been logging off more.

I know I’m supposed to be spending hours on social media promoting my stuff, networking, and doing all the things people with podcasts and blogs are meant to do. But that all feels so pointless and silly.

I’d rather chill with my cats, watch the occasional Nicolas Cage movies with my husband, and listen to books about people surviving in extreme circumstances.

And that’s going to be my whole deal for a while. Because until I can figure out where all the wholesome pervs are hiding, being online isn’t nearly as fun as it could be.

Love,
Emma ❤

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